I hate slow internet. At least it helps me do my homework faster, except i did all this science homework which i thought was due tomorrow, but i just found out it's due on Thursday. Oh well, at least i got it out of the way. Maths assessment task number 2 tomorrow. Co-ordinate geometry. GREEEAAAAT. I haven't done the practise papers. Yeah, helps heaps right? Not really stressing about it that much...is that a bad thing? I'm attempting to do English homework right now, and i also have to do history homework. My goal of sleeping at 11pm won't work by the looks of it. I think the more i sleep, the more tired i am at school. Is that supposed to be normal? Meh, as long as i get through my day i don't really care how i get through it.
I've always wanted a day to be alone, to just reflect on life i guess. But everything around me is so busy and noisy. Everywhere i go, i can't find silence. Even if it's quiet, i can still seem to hear noise. I wish time would just stop. S.T.O.P so i can think about how far i'd come and realize, i am still living in this world. Maybe then, i can tell myself that i am doing a good job! I'm not that much of a bad person! I HAVE A GOOD LIFE. I don't have time. Time is always running out. WHERE DID ALL MY TIME GO? THERE IS NOT MUCH OF IT LEFT. Why am i stressing out about school? Why am i constantly reminding myself to do this, do that, does she hate me, what do i do, why are you leaving? Time is going by so quickly, and i living in the middle of this, scared of where i will end up after another blink. i am scared. I don't want things to go by so fast. I want to live every moment of it and remember every second. Maybe that's why i started a blog in the first place. I dont want to forget. Forgetting things are so scary.
ohmygod what is wrong with me. I was in the middle of doing my english homework and now i am dwelling on this again. I want to be alone though. I want to walk around somewhere alone. I forgot how it felt like being alone. SEE I HATE FORGETTING THINGS.
I'm going now. I want to sleep and dream soon. Unfortunately, i haven't dreamt in like 2 months already. Really sad, because i FORGOT what it felt like dreaming and then waking up with a massive grin on my face thinking, aww i wish that really happened ^^
